Okay, the speechless part is correct. But I might be making up the rest. Just a little. Maybe.
It actually might have went more like:
Ethan, get up. Why are you laying down, please get up. Put the grass down. Stop holding hands... Go get the ball... you CAN steal it... no, not with your hands...
Jacob kick the ball... that ball... right there... get it... yes, that ball. Get back on the field... You can't hold hands during the game...
Kaleb ... I can't say anything about Kaleb, he actually did really well.
Both teams divided into two groups and then played each other. So, it was three on three. Pretty good chances of actual soccer happening right? Ha! First, we could not get Ethan off the ground. And when he was, he was starring off in space. Jacob was much the same, but without the constant laying on the ground. Kaleb was slow at first but then he was the only one of the three to do anything remotely like soccer, however I don't think our team ever scored... much less figured out where the cones were to score. (By the way WASA, where the heck where the goal nets? These are four year olds... they need BIG SCREAMING targets.)
As far as the other team, the Sharks, well let's just say that Sharks like to eat Tigers. To be honest, it wasn't even the three kids on their team... it was one long haired blonde girly girl. I think that she was really eight years old pretending to be four and that girly girl image was clearly a facade. That's my thought at least. She scored every time. On every play. I. Kid. You. Not. Every single play. Through the correct cones even. So many times that we actually lost count. Suffice to say, she kicked butt and took names.
They took a water break every 10 or so minutes. At that point the kids came to their parents for a drink. At that point, the parents huddled down and gave instructions on what to do when they went back into the game. Okay, they might not have been so much instructions as much as maybe... well... pleading, begging and bribes. Look, you never know what you will do until you are faced with the situation yourself... that's all I'm saying... It was quite comical to hear all of us talking to our kids though. At one point we told Ethan to use his Flash (super hero) powers. He ripped up and down the field to show us and everyone what was in him - this during the break - and when the game started back up, he laid down on the field. Sigh...
So, here are some highlights (there were some really good ones that I missed because ... well... because).
The pre-game pep talk by one of the coaches - it went in one ear and out the other for all of them. Yes, that is Ethan laying on the field.
Yep, that's a big grass blade he was picking... during the game.
Holding hands with Jacob...yet again. Awwww...
"Ethan, please get up. Show me those Flash powers. Come on Ethan, show them to me!" I wish I made that up for humor purposes, but really that is what this coach was saying... in a normal and then turned whiny begging voice.
Oh wait... he's running... to the ball... to help... oh... a soccer moment!
Ethan asked us on the way home if he could have some Flash potion to make him Flash right before his next game (Flash was actually strike by a lightening bolt to get his powers but that isn't something we really explain for obvious reasons). So, before Saturday morning I need to come up with a magic Flash potion. Steve was thinking Mountain Dew. I am thinking not. (I still believe that I can get the boys into their teens without drinking soda... I'm a dreamer folks.) Anyone have any ideas for the magical Flash potion?
BTW, since we were late getting onto a soccer team, his shirt still doesn't have a name and number on it. I felt so bad that he was the only one without... maybe that explains his lack of skill tonight. Maybe... I am planning on getting his shirt fixed tomorrow.