Wednesday, January 12, 2011

"Oh no they didn't!"

I almost forgot to share a story from our trip home from vacation. Which, now, makes me laugh... but not so much at the time.

We were at the airport for about two and half hours waiting for our flight. Some of that was just trying to get there early, some of that was a flight delay. The boys did well during this time but started to get really antsy towards the end of this wait. I don't think I need to tell anyone who has small children what happens when you put antsy children in very small quarters where they can't move much and there are a lot of people surrounding them. And so my story begins...

We got on the plane... a very, very hot plane. Found our seats at the back of the plane (Southwest seats families after handicapped and Group A, so to find five seats in a row you are in the back of the plane at that point). Immediately the twins, start asking for the DVD player, as they now knew (going home) that we had one. I start searching for it, knowing that they couldn't even watch it until we took off. The sweat began... I couldn't find it anywhere. I started to panic that I left it at Grandpa and Grandma's house... I started sweating even more as the twins started upping the volume of their inquiry to an angry demand. Finally I found it. Whew!

The next issue, the twins wanted to watch it then and there. Steve thought, incorrectly, that showing them all the movies we had so that they could pick on and thus waste some time would be a good idea. Not so much. Turns out Collin was insistent on Thomas and Oliver wanted Rescue Heroes. At this point it became a tired, wound-up, pinned-in debate between them:

Collin: "Homas! We watch Homas!"
Oliver: "No! I want Rescue Heroes!"
Collin: "Homas!"
Oliver "Rescue Heroes!"
Repeat another 20 times.

We tried to intervene and suggest others and at some point, I am not sure when or how, they both calmed down for a mere millisecond to ask for Scooby Doo. There was no Scooby Doo option. That lead to both scream crying for Scooby Doo.

Collin: "Hooby Doo!"
Oliver: "We want Scooby Doo!"
Repeat 50 times

Yes, it was that bad. I was a pool of sweat at this point. No snacks, drinks, toys or anything could stop it.

So the not-so-helpful male flight attendant goes over to them and says, to two clearly tired, spent, too far gone twin three years olds, "Boys... what seems to be the problem here?" Seriously? Then "Will you please stop crying?" Seriously boy wonder... do you have children? Then, "Lookie, I brought you these coloring books and a colored pencil! Yipee!" People, it was a sheet of paper folded in half with Shamu on it and a colored pencil the same size as the ones by the computers at the library. No, didn't work. Shocker. Ticked them off more actually. Screaming continued.

At this point I heard a passenger mutter "Do you have a Scooby Doo DVD you could give them for the love of ..."

Gulp. Sweat. Sink in seat.

Thankfully, about five minutes after that, the plane took off. At that point we had something real and exciting to show them that actually interested them. They slowly stopped crying as soon as we started moving and altogether stopped when we took off as they were mesmerized looking out the window. At that point, when they became silent for the first time since we sat down five hours... er, I mean, 20 minutes earlier, the ENTIRE back half of the plane broke into loud applause and cheers... including the male fight attendant.

After the thought, "Oh no they didn't", came a lot more sweat. Red face. Sink in seat. Start praying it lasts the entire trip, and that if it doesn't that they don't ban together as a group, open up an emergency exit and throw the twins out.

And luckily the view from the window of the plane and everything getting smaller below excited them. They actually were cute little three year olds again, talking about the sky, sun, clouds and small houses and cars. When they were just starting to loose interest, Steve quickly popped in a DVD (that he picked) and turned it on. They happily affixed their attention to the screen and didn't say another word the rest of the flight. I have never been so grateful... or sweaty.

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